"Am I Making Too Many Kids?"

Okay, So last time out I began revealing some of my neurosis on having a boy and the fear and concerns I have in my own abilities to turn that boy into a “man” or a redneck ( if you read the last post, you’ll know what I mean).  We've been down that road, and I’m sure we’ll go back down it again, but let’s get to what’s crossing my frontal lobe today.

Let’s talk about overpopulating

“Overpopulated” by Cobra Skulls     Overpopluated By Cobra Skulls 

well we've all got the right

Guaranteed by a state

And even a god

Demands that it's my job

Just to procreate

For everyone to feed

Something's gotta bleed

Now are you gonna take

Until there's nothing to do but leave?

So do you have to

Keep on populating

Overpopulating

Who's going to refuse the right?

We've got to be equal

But too many people

Are making it harder to survive

I love this band, and I love this song. But with two girls in my house, and a baby boy on the way, it’s obvious that I missed the message, right?

That’s what I said.

Well, I do worry that I’m adding to the human populace that is going add to, and live through, the worsening of Al Gore’s Global Warming, not to mention witness who knows what from technology (time machines, teleporters, and robot anarchists is my guess). Then of course, we have the ever growing threat of financial collapse, and the massive debt we owe to China (who will probably take control of the earth behind the power of the first race of robots). Don’t forget that there’s supposed to be another “monster flu” epidemic at some point, and who knows what Al-Qaeda has up their sleeves, and all those monster storms (due to AG’s GW). I guess you could make an argument that I’m an asshole for bringing more life into this scary future before us. I don’t know. While I’m nervous about tomorrow, I still wouldn't change the path I’m on.

The world is filled to the brim with human beings, so why do I keep making more!

It’s fairly simple- I love my wife, and we make cool kids. I know, I know, I've got some bias going on here, but take my word for it, despite all of my quirks; these kids are turning out pretty rad. Besides being ultra-mega cute, and being the best reciprocators for love (something that we all long for and need), my two little ladies do the greatest thing humans can do- They sing and they dance. I mean, how fucking cool is that? I’m telling you, you cannot witness their plethora of dance moves that accompany any number of tunes- from your ABC’s to Kasey Chambers to their own made up songs about sleeping kitties and magic rainbows. They make me smile, genuinely smile, at least a handful of times, every single day. You can’t beat that.  

So, yeah, I am helping to overpopulate the earth with humans, but I can’t help it- they’re just too damn amazing.

Sorry, Cobra Skulls. You guys are still the best, and I’ll still crank your records, but I gotta have my monkeys.

Check out the  Cobra Skulls (punk rock)

Cheers!

"That's why they call me Whiskers" The man of a thousand worries.

Now that we've got the introduction out of the way, let’s move on to why I’m here.

Current events (in Glenn’s world)

The biggest development in my world right now would be the fact that my wife and I found out we’ll be welcoming a baby boy to our fold. This may seem like a simple “Hey, congratulations!” type of deal and it is, partially. We've managed to help two small humans learn to walk, talk, dress, and feed themselves (not to mention how to say “no”, “damn”, and “goober”). We’ve been to two dance recitals, put them though a few swimming classes, and watched Ruby try her hand at field hockey. They each own little, semi-playable guitars (Ruby’s is pink, Ramona’s is purple), and a ton of cute teddy bears and bunnies. They both seem to really like Barbie and mostly any Disney movie (side note: Ruby does hold a soft spot for Ghostbusters, Spider-Man movies, and the Corpse Bride). We seem to have things pretty much figured out. When Ramona was born, we kind of felt lost, trying to remember how we did it with Ruby, but within days, it all seemed to come back like riding a bike, or remembering all of the members of Winger. Ramona was/is different from her big sister; she’s a little rougher (I like to say she was born mean-which my wife hates), she prefers milk over juice, water, and/or food, she likes pizza, and she usually prefers blue to pink. We have two little princesses who know how to get what they want, especially from daddy. But this, this next baby…this is a boy. What the hell do we know about raising a boy? My wife has admitted that she’s nervous, and a little scared, and that she is unsure about what we’re in for. I, on the other hand, have been pretty quiet since finding out. I was certain that we were destined for a third princess. I just thought that I was going to be the dad with three teenage girls wreaking havoc on my sanity, bossing me around, and taking all of my money. Well, that’s not the case. I am no longer going to be alone, as the only man in the house, but that doesn't mean I have any more of a clue about what’s to come. I now have the responsibility of making my boy a man. Easy said, but the fact of the matter is that I still feel like a boy myself.

 Insecurities, yeah, I've got a few.

So here are my worries (and they may, or may not sound ridiculous to you): I can’t fix a car to save my life- If I look at an engine, I might as well be looking at lady parts- I don’t know what’s going on in there. At 35, I still can’t grow a beard. I don’t have any ATV’s. I've never been hunting, or fishing. I can’t skate (on ice, or on a board). I’m not the toughest guy on the block (there are high school kids who could make mincemeat of my face). I’m not a super confident dude. I've never been a ladies man (despite what my mother says about my time spent in Denver). And did I mention that my wrists look like they belong on a twelve year old? So, basically, I’m the quiet version of a nervous wreck. Girls are easy (in a learning capacity way), plus I don’t have to teach them about periods, and training bras-my wife does.  Now this? I am going to be responsible for helping this baby boy grow up to be a man? Looking back at my list of concerns I am left wondering whether I’m looking to raise a “man”, or a “redneck”.  I don’t know. I’m a little scared to walk down this road, as well. I’m right there with my wife in feeling clueless. She’s already talking about these ”pee tents” that would serve to protect us while changing his diaper, I don’t know. We’re both in for a whole different ball game this time around, and that alone is unnerving. I know I’m not alone in that aspect, but I can’t help but to feel an added amount of pressure this time around to help sculpt this child. To quote the great Will Ferrell as Harry Carey, “I’m a worrier, that’s why they call me whiskers.”

Will everything turn out for the best? I’m sure, but does that make me worry any less? No. I guess if worse comes to worst, I can pass on my vast knowledge of 80’s hair bands. Doesn't the world need a new Poison?

Hello.
They call me Glenn, not Maybe. The "they" I speak of is my little (growing) family. There's my wife, Meghan, and my two little girls, Ruby (almost 6) and Ramona (almost 3), and the "growing" bit is in reference to our 3rd kid that is due in March! We are expecting our first boy (whom we are naming, Axl).  That will be a family of five! The wife and I both work full time, I started going to college part time online, Ruby is in Kindergarten, and I'm also an aspiring author. Who's got the time? Glenn, whose got the time, has it because he makes it. I do, that's right.

I wanted to start a blog to sort of work on my writing, keep a journal, and basically have a place to impart my knowledge upon anyone who reads it, or make you a little dumber for doing so.

Let's talk about Glenn.
I am 35. I used to play in punk rock bands (we even made a video once! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KDyNKWUpVsA ), now I'm working full time at a Hampton Inn, while going to college in an effort to improve my writing skills. I used to write little crazy horror stories in my old notebooks, just for myself. It was another creative outlet. Then, last year, I decided I wanted to write a novel. It was scary, it was daunting, but I was out of work at the time, and decided "what the hell".

 So, who's got time for college, writing and kids?
Me.
It's not easy, but I find ways (and time) to get things done. The first thing that had to go was playing in bands. As much as I love it, and miss it, I had to prioritize my life. Going back to school was a no-brainer, and with a family of 4 (soon to be 5), so was full time work. Luckily, I love the hotel industry, and the people I work with with. Now, where do I fit in time to write? Wait a minute...what about video games? Surely, a 35 year old man in 2012 plays video games, right? Unfortunately, the answer is yes. It's a vice I haven't quite learned to shake. I am not nearly as bad as others my age, but still probably log 5 to 6 hours of my free time behind a Playstation 3 controller. Now, if you factor in work, watching Ramona, picking or dropping Ruby off from school, putting in at least 6 hours for my school, while still trying to have time to work on my stories...well, you can see where I'm going. Video games (Madden football, and NBA2K basketball)  are really taking up valuable time.There's a guy in my horror writers club that wrote a great piece regarding the need for authors to prioritize their free time. I stopped for about a month, but have since, slipped back into my old ways.  Needless to say, I am still working on it. As for the time to write, well, 2 of my shifts at work are on the night audit. That's a 11 pm -7 am shift. From about midnight to 2 or 3, I have enough quiet time to sit down with my laptop and work on whatever project I'm currently creating. My other shifts are usually 3-11's. On those nights, I try to do a little writing after work, from about midnight to 2. I'll go in to my writing process in a later blog.

I want to keep these little blogs fairly short, and simple. So, I am going to leave this intro blog as is. My apologies, if this first entry is a little un-organized (un-organisized, to quote Mr. Bickle). I will be working towards making a nice, readable blog for the future. And speaking of the future-
I will be writing on the challenges of parenthood (love that TV show, by the way), and the great balancing act it takes to work, go to school, and attempt to begin a writing career.
If you want to follow along, feel free. Oh, and if you're on Facebook, go check out and "like" my writing page: http://www.facebook.com/glennrolfehorror

I'll be here, regardless.

Cheers,
Glenn